Tom: G major•
Verse 1
G
Em
Am
D
G
D
G
D
G
D
Colonel Montmorency,
G
D
who was in Calcutta in 92,
G
D
G
emerged from his retirement for the war.
He wasn't very pleased
Bbdim
D
with all he heard and all he saw,
Abdim
he tightened his belt and
Am
D
organized a corps.
G
D
Poor Colonel Montmorency thought,
considering all the wars he'd fought,
D
Bbaug
job to do or die
D
G
Em
But after days and weeks and years,
D
G
bravely drying his manly tears,
D
Ebdim
he wrote the following letter
D
A
D
to the Minister of Supply
G
D
Could you please oblige us with a Bren gun,
Bm
A
D
or failing that, a hand grenade will do
We've got some ammunition,
G
in a rather damp condition
A
Ebdim
A ma jor house has an ark with us
Em
A
D
that was used at Waterloo
G
With the vicar's tirrapante,
a pitchfork and a spade,
Ebdim
B
it's rather hard to guard
Em
Baug
an aerodrome.
G
C
C#dim
So if you can't ob lige
G
D
E
us with a Bren gun,
Am
D
G
the Home Guard might as well go home.
D
G
Could you please oblige us
We're getting awfully
Bbdim
D
tired of drawing lots.
Today we had a shipment
G
of some curious equipment,
D
Ebdim
D
A
D
they sent us a tank that ties itself in knots.
G
On Sunday's mock invasion,
Captain Clark was heard to say
Ebdim
B
Em
He hadn't even got a brush and comb.
G
C
C#dim
So if you can't ob lige
G
D
E
us with a brand gun,
Am
D
The Home Guard might as well go
G
C
G
D
G
D
home.
G
D
Colonel Montmorency planned,
G
D
in case the enemy tried to land,
G
D
to drive them back with skill
C#dim
He realised his army
Bbdim
D
should be mechanised,
course,
G
D
Poor Colonel Montmorency tried,
G
D
at infinite cost of time and pride,
G
D
Bbaug
to tackle his superiors again.
D
Em
Having just one motorbike,
D
G
fourteen swords and a marlin spike,
D
Ebdim
he wrote the following letter
D
A
D
in the following ur gent train.
Bm
Bbdim
D
We need it very badly, I'm afraid.
Our local crossword solver
G
has an excellent revolver.
A
D
But during a short attack on the fort,
the trigger got misplayed.
C
G
planned for Friday afternoon,
Em
Baug
the Hippodrome.
G
C
So if you can't oblige us
D
G
D
E
with the Bren gun,
Am
D
G
the Home Guard might as well go home.
D
G
C
G
Could you please oblige us
A
D
The lack of one is wounding to our pride.
Last night we found the cutest little
A
D
He looked at our kit and giggled
Em
A
D
a bit and laughed until he cried.
G
G
We'll have to hide that armored car
when marching to Berlin.
B
We'd all must be ashamed of it in Rome
D
G
C
C#dim
So if you can't ob lige
G
D
E
us with a brand Gun,
Am
D
G
C
G
the Home Guard might as well go home
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