Tom: Bb minor
Verse 1
F
What I said at the beginning of the show
F
Denver's a fucking awesome town.
This is an awesome state.
G
This is the best part of the state.
It's like Boulder's
F
just a little too crunchy.
There's a few too many fucking
Am
Birkenstock
Am
G
bead holding shitheads.
F
A few too many people said Sat Naam.
G
Oh, did you say Sat Naam, you
fucker?
Namaste.
Eb
Yeah, that's in your vernacular,
F
G
You wanna go to find dudes,
F
homeless dudes with fucking signs,
G
that's the world capital.
F
And they don't let them freeze,
What do you wanna do?
Listen, man, there's
a reason.
There's a reason why we got this far.
We got this far because of competition.
I know it's not good to compete,
Am
and it's also good to embrace
G
F
each other
and our community
Am
G
and help each other out,
but there's also like certain ones
that have to die off.
You know? It's like my main
argument with zoos.
I have a problem with the zoo,
and there's a bunch of problems with the zoo,
but the main one is that in the zoo,
F
the animals are allowed to be
which never happens in the wild.
You know, like how are the
monkeys
gonna learn to juke and to zig and zag
and get away from jaguars
if they're alone by themselves?
They're not.
F
The monkeys that live in the zoo
are weak bitches,
G
Am
Okay, and what they need to
G
is let everybody live together.
Look, they'll keep fucking
Am
G
if you keep giving them food.
Let them live together.
F
What happens when they die?
G
Get new ones, bring them in.
Yeah, that's what you're supposed
to do.
F
And the zoo's not bad for all animals.
I think it's bad for smart animals.
G
Like I'm totally opposed to SeaWorld.
should never be in captivity.
G
I think it's ridiculous. but I
have no problem with giraffes.
F
G
You know why? Because giraffes don't
F
G
seem to have a problem with it.
E
in Colorado Springs?
F
I went, I took my kid when she was three
G
and they let her feed a fucking giraffe.
F
G
She's a baby.
F
They're so confident in the way giraf
Am
fes behave.
G
They let fucking babies feed
F
them.
G
She's reaching out, holding this
piece of lettuce
Em
G
and this giant fuckin' avatar -lookin'
thing wanders over
F
G
with a head bigger than my torso
and reaches out this alien tongue
and grabs the lettuce
and my daughter's giggling and
everybody's smiling,
Am
all these fuckin' white people
F
G
are so happy.
That's how easy giraffes
happen.
F
The giraffes don't look bummed out.
You go to the monkey cage,
they look like they're freakin'
out.
Am
I'm outta here!
G
You go see the giraffes, they're like,
Another day with no lions.
G
Em
They got no problem with the zoo,
man.
Am
G
They're like, this is way better
than the wild.
F#m
Am
If you came up to a wild giraffe
I got a deal for you, man.
Here's the deal.
F
I'm going to give you free food
for the rest of your life.
You never have to worry about
starving to death.
but you can't walk as far.
They were like, uh, okay, shit,
but you're going to be trapped.
Uh, okay.
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