Tom: D major
Intro 1
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A
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G
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Verse 1
D
["Ugli
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est Thing I've Ever
She was long and thin like a rolling pin
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D
with a similar striking pose.
G
D
At first I thought she had two heads,
A
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but one of them was a nose.
A
D
ugliest thing I've ever seen.
She said, honey, you just saved my life.
G
D
That was really quite a treat.
G
And with a loving squeeze
she swept me off my feet.
G
Well, she screamed so tight,
I thought that I might bulge
right out my suture
D
And when she put me down,
there was a crumblin' sound
And she says, you do look cute,
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Ugliest thing I've ever seen
I was black and blue
and battered and bruised
G
But I climbed back in the car
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G
D
The examiner says, lay stiff on it, son
And go someplace where you burn
G
Well, I zoomed off like a thunderbolt
on no particular route
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Then heard him shout, I'm bailin' out,
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she's hangin' off the boot
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G
She was ugly,
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ugliest thing I've ever seen
Well, the cottage on the examiner
G
caught the first train out of town
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G
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And I'd have been right behind him,
only one thing held me down
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Yeah, 17 stone skin and bone,
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Eb
well, you know just who I mean
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Yes, I am talking about
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the ugliest bird I have ever seen
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She was ugly, ugliest thing I've ever seen
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ugliest thing I've ever seen
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Oh yeah! She went ugly!
Outro 1
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