Tom: G major•
Intro 1
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Bm
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Bm
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C#dim
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Verse 1
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Bm
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He gets up real early on
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his mornin' drive
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Bm
D
Down to the office for his 9 to 5
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economy car
Loves to tell the local bands down
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at the bar that he's the critic
Bm
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Yea,
Verse 2
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C#dim
I can hook you up,
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I know everybody, in the business
Verse 3
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Bm
He flunked ju nior high band
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he couldn't march in time
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He tried to write a song once,
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he couldn't make it rhyme
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He went two or three chords
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on a pawn shop guitar
He just never quite had what it took to be a star,
A
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so he's a critic
Verse 4
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man I got a real job
Verse 5
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He did a 5- star column on
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He did a bluegrass review
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about an un kind word
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He thought it was time to
Em
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Em
His boss said I can't even tell if any
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body's even readin' your page
Yeah
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Bm
C
Verse 6
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Em
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Bm
So he thought
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And he thought a little more
Verse 7
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Bm
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He caught a young hot star
headin' into town
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Bm
And then he hid behind his typewriter
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and gunned the boy down
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C
Here come the letters, the e- mails,
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Bm
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the faxes, they raised him to 20,000 dollars after taxes
Verse 8
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He's a happy critic
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He's rollin in the dough
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Man I could do this forever
Bm
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This is easy everybody's
Verse 9
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Please don't tell my mom,
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that I write the music column for the gazette
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She still thinks I play piano down
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at the cathouse
Verse 10
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Let's get funky with this now boys
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Play it on out
Verse 11
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Come on Shannon
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C
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There's ole biff jumpin' in
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G
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Come on Shannon
D
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C
D
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C
Aww yea, my man Steve
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Man my fingers are gettin'
tired
Y'all gonna have to hurry
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This snappin' thing
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Verse 12
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Hello Shannon
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Guess he's on coffee
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They're gonna love you 'cause
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they already love me
(Yeah)
Verse 13
Outro 1
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Bm
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Eb
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G
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