Tom: G# minor
Verse 1
Em
One- fifty one- thousand
C#m
Em
D
Six- hundred people die
C#m
Em
D
And if that's not a reason to cry
Em
Well, it's an awful lot
of paperwork
It's your first day at work
C#m
A
How've you settled in?
D
Shaken off the rigor mortis? Sorted
Welcome to our newest
C#m
C#dim
resident skeleton
D
What better heaven than a desk
Em
To spend forever in? Now, your
body may be
Shrivelled up and worthless
D
At least we know your funeral
Em
Will be a civil ser vice
C#dim
Persons so superfluous are living
Em
D
On the surface it's nothing
so perturbing
Em
We're just trimming off the surplus
It isn't murder if you
C#m
C#dim
Cause a little accident
Some "mortal middle
Em
management"
There's the door
C#dim
We've got millions of applicants
D
Em
Dying for some cor porate
Em
Incorporeal entanglement
Verse 2
C#dim
Everything living has to die
Em
D
But to die, you need not apply
B
Em
We'll find you when your
time's through
C#dim
D
Take a number, wait in line
Live your life and we'll be right
C#dim
Nothing's certain but death and taxes
get some practice
C#dim
but death and taxes
Em
So I guess you'd better
A
You've got targets to prove yourself
Verse 3
D
Here's some targets,
Shoo a few humans off the
C#m
A
D
Mortal shelf to the floor
We'll be polishing the coffins as
C#dim
We need a botanist, two paleontologists
D
A newspaper columnist whose views
A shoe salesman,
C#m
A
D
possible balloon hobbyist
Just another couple popped clogs
Em
For your shopping list
No slacking on the grave packing
C#m
A
D
Ever more to kill death
row deplorables
Em
Incurables and "sort of ill"
every person
C#dim
Animal and plant has a form to fill
solely tasked
Em
With killing chlorophyll so, of course
C#dim
You will toe the lifeline
D
Or you'll be filing dandelions before
Em
You've had your tea break
Humanity's in balance
C#dim
Em
If that balance isn't repaid
D
Em
Interns can be inhumed
Verse 4
C#dim
Everything living has to die
Em
D
But to die, you need not apply
Em
We'll find you when your
time's through
C#dim
D
Take a number, wait in line
Live your life and we'll be
B
Em
right behind you
C#dim
Nothing's certain but death and taxes
D
So I guess you'd better get
C#dim
Nothing's certain but death and taxes
Em
So I guess you'd better
Verse 5
A
Ashes to ashes, nine to five
D
The light in the tunnel has been
C#dim
Robes were so behind the times
D
These ob ituaries don't give any
B
Em
Time for scythes
C#dim
Population moderation's not
the worst fate
D
Your occupation's the salvation of
for generations
C#dim
We've been racing for
the first place
D
Em
But we've spent the cen turies in
Verse 6
Second to the birth rate
Em
C#dim
Everything living has to die
Em
D
But to die, you need not apply
Em
We'll find you when your
time's through
C#dim
D
Take a number, wait in line
Live your life and we'll be right
C#dim
Nothing's certain but death and taxes
get some practice
C#dim
A
but death and taxes
Em
So I guess you'd better
Verse 7
D
gathered here today
to pay tribute
Em
To the life of the departed
D
And to welcome him to the office
May he rest employed
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