Tom: F major
Verse 1
F#
C#
F#
Phew! There's something
Oh! It's you
Come here and sit down
You're gonna have the truth told
C#
F#
about you and put on record
C#
F#
'Ere please don't sit too close to me,
I'm just having my breakfast
C#
F#
Thank you
Verse 2
F#
D#m
D#
G#
C#
Who put salt in the sugar bowl?
F#
D#m
G#
C#
Who put fireworks in the coal?
F#
B
F#
Who put a real live toad in the hole?
G#
F#
My brother
D#m
G#m
C#
Who put jam in mother's shoe?
F#
D#m
G#
C#
Who made real caterpillars stew?
F#
B
F#
Who locked grandad in the loo?
My brother
Verse 3
B
A#
A#m
D#m
My brother said it was n't he
G#m
C#
F#
Who put shampoo in grandma's tea?
B
F#
C#
D#
My brother said that it was me
G#
F#
C#
My brother's rotten
F#
D#m
G#
C#
Who squeezed toothpaste round the hall?
F#
D#m
G#
C#
Who put soot in the baby's butts?
F#
B
Who drew things on the garden wall?
D#m
F#
My brother
Verse 4
F#
You ought to see what he drew
Ah, what a surprise
Nobody knew what it was really
C#
F#
But everybody had a
"Down with young mothers"
that was one
C#
'Cause he don't think our mum
F#
knows how to bring us up right
C#
F#
I don't think so either
You know every night when we're wide awake,
she makes us go to bed
And in the morning when we're fast asleep,
C#
F#
she makes us get up
Verse 5
F#
G#m
C#
Whose pet mouse made auntie shriek?
F#
D#m
G#
C#
Who ate glue and couldn't speak?
F#
B
F#
What clever dick was sick for a week?
F#
D#m
G#m
C#
Who keeps maggots in a tin?
F#
D#m
G#
Plays the twist on his violin
C#
F#
B
C#
Who's been gettin' at the gin?
Verse 6
Bm
F#
D#m
a chimney sweep
G#m
C#
F#
But dirt they say is just skin deep
A#m
D#
G#
he's asleep!
F#
But you don't know what he's
B
F#
C#
F#
dreamin' about (do ya)
D#m
Who wouldn't mind if I
Verse 7
G#m
C#
ride his bike?
F#
D#m
G#
C#
Who lets me shot his gun if I like?
F#
B
Who says I'm best at football,
Bm
F#
ludo, snakes and ladders?
Hide- and- seek,
B
G
chasin' each other up and down the garden
F#
Pinchin' little girls up the
Well, he's gotta say I'm best
F#
B
'Cause I'm bigger than he is and if he don't say I'm best at everything,
F#
B
F#
I'll bash him, haha
C#
F#
My lovely, lovely brother
Verse 8
F#
Come on, come on mate,
let's get out of here
Before you fall down the
Come on give us your
C#
F#
hand' we're gonna wal—
'Ere what you had in your hand
'Ave ya
Woo!
C#
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