Tom: E major•
Intro 1
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Verse 1
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Mom got drunk and Dad
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B
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got drunk at our Christmas party
G#m
C#m
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We were drinking champagne punch
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and homemade eggnog
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Little sister brought her new boyfriend
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He was a Mex ican
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G#m
We didn't know what to
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think of him until he sang
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Verse 2
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Brother Ken brought his kids with him
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The three from his first wife Lynn
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And the two identical twins from
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his second wife Mary Neil
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Of course he brought his new wife Kay
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Who talks all about AA
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Chain smoking while the stereo plays Noel,
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Noel
The First Noel
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Verse 3
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Cook the Turkey
Mix margaritas when the eggnog's gone
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Send somebody to the Quickpak Store
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We need some ice and an extension cord
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F#m
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A can of bean dip and some Diet Rites
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A box of tampons and some
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Halleluja everybody say Cheese
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Merry Christmas from the family
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Verse 4
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Fred and Rita drove from Harlingen
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I can't remember how I'm kin to them
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G#m
But when they tried to plug
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their motor home in
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They blew our Christmas lights
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Cousin David knew just what went wrong
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So we all waited out on our front lawn
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He threw a breaker and
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the lights came on
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And we sang Silent Night, Silent Night,
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Verse 5
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Cook the turkey turn the ball game on
Cause We All Want One!
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Send somebody to the Stop 'N Go
and a can of fake snow
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A bag of lemons and some Diet Sprites
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Halleluja, everybody say cheese
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Merry Christmas from the Family
Verse 6
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G#m
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Fe l iz Navidad
Outro 1
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