Tom: G# minor
Verse 1
G#m
E
G#m
It was during my 2nd senior year
E
G#m
when Mom found Jesus Christ. His
G#m
E
manischevitz bottle that Mom picked
G#m
E
G#m
out of the dumpster behind the 7-11. Mom
brought the bottle inside and
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G#m
sat it down on top of the TV. Then she
E
G#m
told all of us kids to gather
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G#m
E
round, and then she explained how Jesus lived in the bottle,
and how,
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G#m
E
she could call him out to do her bidding. Sis said it
G#m
E
reminded her of an old TV show,
G#m
and Mom slapped her and called her a
E
G#m
heretic. I didn't say anything,
E
cause I just still remember the time
G#m
outside the Safeway, when it took 4 security
E
B
guards to hold Mom down.
Verse 2
When I'm weak he makes me strong
If I die before I wake
G#m
E
Pray to him my soul don't take
Jesus loves me,
yes I know
G#m
Verse 3
G#m
E
all over the world started coming to
G#m
E
our house to see the bottle. At first
G#m
I thought that this would make me
G#m
E
seemed to have the opposite result.
G#m
E
G#m
Kids would stop and point at me in the hallway
G#m
whose mother keeps our savior cooped
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G#m
up in that tiny little bottle." And
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G#m
then everybody started calling me 'Bottle
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G#m
boy'. And that really hurt. It
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G#m
was also around this time that Mom began
G#m
E
followers. Like that guy who never
G#m
used deodorant and spoke only in
E
G#m
E
riddles. And that woman who collected
G#m
E
B
19th century hand made Amish
swimwear.
Verse 4
For the Bible tells me so
If I die before I wake
G#m
E
Pray to him my soul don't take
Jesus loves me, yes I know
Verse 5
she loved Jesus,
which our savior lived
B#
For she could unleash His vengeance
Verse 6
E
G#m
As the year went on, things went from bad to worse,
and I realized that
if there wasn't a big change pretty soon,
C#m
G#m
I'd never be able to get a
E
date for the prom. I couldn't go the
G#m
year before because Mom belonged
to a church that considered dancing
E
G#m
a one way ticket to Hell. But
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G#m
E
that's a whole nother story. Anyway,
G#m
by this point Mom had appeared on
the Richard Bey Show,
C#m
E
G#m
A.M. Philadelphia and Geraldo, so there was
G#m
since everybody knew who my Mom was.
C#m
G#m
Also we had to spend all the money
C#m
G#m
from Mom's personal appearances to
C#m
E
hire a bodyguard, since by this point
G#m
E
we were getting about 400 death
Verse 7
G#m
E
For the Bible tells me so
When I'm weak he makes me strong
If I die before I wake
G#m
E
Pray to him my soul don't take
Verse 8
B
G#m
Then one night, I just couldn't stand
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G#m
it any more. While everyone else
B
G#m
was sleeping I crept downstairs.
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G#m
Slowly I went up to the bottle and
B
G#m
E
began to unfasten the lid. At first,
G#m
B
nothing happened. But then the room
G#m
E
filled with a thick white smoke. I was
B
batteries out of the smoke detector to
G#m
E
put into her Walkman. When the
G#m
B
G#m
E
smoke cleared, I found myself face to face with the son of God,
who was
G#m
much shorter than I had expected.
B
He told me that since I'd freed Him,
G#m
E
He'd grant me one wish. And that's how
G#m
E
B
I got to go to the prom with
G#m
E
Geena Davis. But you probably already
Verse 9
G#m
E
For the Bible tells me so
When I'm weak he makes me strong
If I die before I wake
G#m
Pray to him my soul don't take
Verse 10
which our savior lived
B#
For she could unleash His vengeance
by unfastening the lid
in which our savior lived
B#
For she could unleash His vengeance
by unfastening the lid
G#m
E
G#m
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