Tom: D major•
Verse 1
A
I was in Santa Monica paper,
D
A
it said, penis enlargement, big letters,
and in little letters it said for men only.
Am
G
Am
The man waited, the wo man groaned,
F
G
A
she was lost in labor's toil,
F
Em
the act of passion and joy
D
Am
D
ten fingers ten toes two eyes
C
Am
two ears a mouth and a nose
B
and that one inch of flesh
that proclaims it's a boy
Em
the midwife inspected his belly
Bm
Em
and bum counted appendages
D
one by one took his sweet willie
E
twixt finger and thumb looked
A
at it in wonder and said.
D
A
D
Does this little spike of flesh
G
D
define the stronger sex?
G
Will this little pleasure rod
F#m
Em
A
put this baby next to God?
G
Is this the thing that gets him
F#
Bm
Will these round thingamabobs
Em
F#
get this child a better job?
Bm
Pi lot, not a stewardess.
A
Professor, not a teacher.
D
Bm
A chance to get there first.
D
G
Em
The scepter that makes kingdoms,
D
Bm
the key that opens doors,
Em
the reason why this baby won't be
A
scrubbing kitchen floors.
Dm
A
She laid the little dickie down
Dm
Am
and gave a weary smile.
C
F
Give him an itch and he'll take a mile.
You
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