Barely there are more ways of
serving
God than locking the thighs together.
May hapt will weaken when the
hair sprouts below the navel.
Nay, I can scarce cover it with my hand
now.
Hear ye that, my little
Beaumont?
Does that not cause some
little bird about ye to flutter?
Step right up, folks, and get your ticket to
L .A., the greatest freak show on earth.
You'll see poor
Patty, a beautiful orphan,
a tan in army surplus clothes
Alone in the city,
selling the free press to your friends
Watch as the amazing
Flying
Fat, an overweight,
out -of -work drew -press operator
Takes
Patty into an abandoned parking lot
Then see her saved by the flaming faggot,
with orange hair, a pink face, and a
Chevrolet
Meet
Dolph
Debbie, a 16 machine
Wild
John bullshit world fabulous discoverer
Tells he uses his fabulous vi be power
To get himself a date
And
Mr.
America stands in his one room
On his one chair
His hands in the air
Taking pictures of himself in a mirror
I'm gonna leave
Chicago
Heading for
LA
I'm gonna leave
Chicago
Don't miss
Vito's famous show within a show
Carol the snake charmer,
Brenda the belly
dancer,
Ida the sword swallower, the
GTO review
Bernard of the body sniffer,
Tinkerbat teller
of fortunes with tear -up cards,
Peggy the witch
The three blind mice of
Palisades
High,
The three kings of moon, fire,
Buddha, the mystic, and many others,
demons, witches.
Here comes
Smiley, superstar, with his traveling toupee,
his teeth in a jar,
his hearing aid on record,
and his vibrator working.
They're all there, yeah, folks,
live and in person.
Calvin, chemistry,
Danny, doper, flower,
who dropped six reds of rat poison,
and he's dead today.
You'll meet them all an
d you'll go down to the
Jolly
Birch
Jail after a ride on the sinking ship
with sirens on it.
There you'll watch the
drunk judge sober himself each morning
for clear -cut decisions with
Al ka -Seltzer
and a tomato fizz fizz fizz.
There you'll watch
Patty who's been beaten, raped
and robbed, put through many things.
Judge, not one bummer,
the whole beautiful summer!