Tom: D minor
Verse 1
E
Am
Oh, you're alive
F
I suppose that's good news for you
E
Am
But it means a lot more paperwork for me
Verse 2
Am
F
So don't expect me to be happy to see you
E
Am
Of course, being alive is temporary
Verse 3
F
So, maybe if I go away and play
Am
pinochle for a few hours
F
Things might improve, for me,
Am
F
not for you, you'd be dead
Verse 4
E
Am
Where am I?
F
Great, you haven't been debriefed
E
Am
This is way out of my pay grade
Which is saying a lot cause I
E
Someone find Professor Hay- For- Breath
and tell him Peter Johnson is awake
So he better clip- clop over here!
Whatever!
Verse 5
E
Bb
where everything's the worst
C
F
Just an other terrible day
G
Am
G
When you're in charge,
Am
G
E
Am
it's like you're cursed
Verse 6
F
Well, technically I am cursed
Am
E
F
One romp in the woods with Zeus' favor
Am
F
ite wood nymph
Am
And you're stuck running a summer
F
Camp for a bunch of needy
Half- blood?
F
Yeah, half- god, half- mortal,
Am
F
does no one watch the orientation film?
Am
Did you say half- god?
Verse 7
F
Am
F
Who's next? Silena Beauregard!
Am
F
Oh, great, she's crying
Am
F
I was walking in the strawberry fields
Am
with Charlie Beckendorf
F
And we were holding hands and
Am
everything was totally normal
F
Am
F
Am
And then I kissed him and all of a sudden he started growing sunflowers,
everywhere
E
Verse 8
Am
Look, kid
F
I hate to be the one to tell you
E
But I think that Charlie Beckendorf was also
Am
holding hands with a nymph
E
F
D
That doesn't wanna wish you well
Am
the best thing to do is to break up with the guy
Verse 9
F
'Course, who am I to give relationship advice,
Am
F
I'm literally the god of alcohol
F
Am
He loves you not! Next!
Verse 10
C
F
Another terrible day
E
Bb
where everything's the worst
F
C
F
Just another terrible day
G
Am
F
I'm the god of wine an d
Verse 11
F
Wait, did you say you're a god?
Am
F
Dionysus, god of wine? The gods are real,
Am
F
yippy skippy
Ah, Katie Gardner,
Am
F
I see you've injured your arm
F
You don't have flying lessons on Thursdays,
F
Those arrows are made of wood!
Am
F
Wood comes from trees!
Am
F
I refuse to participate in any activity that encourages
Am
F
E
Am
the senseless slaughter of our arboreal friends
Verse 12
F
Am
Give me Ares or Apollo
E
Am
Anyone but the Demeter kids' cabin
Now that you blessed us
E
Before I take a knife to my
Am
E
head and start stabbing
C
E
F
G
And stay away from the pegasi!
Bb
Am
F
Am
Ah, speaking of ponies
Verse 13
F
what are you doing here?
This guy is saying all this crazy stuff
about nymphs and gods and
What is going on?
F
Am
Oh, kid, you have no idea
About this place or your former mentor
I don't have time to fill
E
Am
But look, he's also a centaur,
Dm
C
F
C
Am
C
God!
E
Am
D
I did mean to tell you
Verse 14
C
F
Another terrible day
(Mr. Brunner!)
G
At Camp Half- Blood (you're a
horse!)
F
Bb
Where everything's the worst,
C
F
another terrible day
What is happening?
G
Am
You can hate it here, but I hated it first
C
F
Just another terrible day,
G
Bb
stuck with these runts in the muck and mud
C
E
F
E
Am
G
D
Another terrible day, oh gods
Enjoy your stay at Camp Half- Blood
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