Tom: B minor
Intro 1
D
C
G#
Verse 1
C#m
There was a time when I saw
A
myself a flood- lit figure on the stage
C#m
The Metropolitan Opera,
B
the Daily Critic's latest rage
F#m
Abm
But my voice went through a change
Bbm
Bm
about the same time as my skin
B
Abm
Dbm
Now the op era is gone and what
D#m
G#m
is left is getting awfully thin
C#m
Verse 2
There was a time when I saw myself
A
a superstar upon the stage
C#m
In someone's rock and roll opera,
B
but then my throat began to age
F#m
Abm
And I wound up working night s with
Bbm
Bm
afternoons when I'm awake
B
Abm
Dbm
Ebm
So I watch the daily dramas as my life
Abm
becomes a coffee break
Dbm
Verse 3
Db
Here's the story up to date
Bbm
Shirley's found another mate
Fm
Though she'll wind up with
Abm
B
her husband in the end
Gb
But her husband's got no life
Ebm
He can't make it with his wife
Abm
Though his secretary's more
Verse 4
Db
It's a day- to- day routine and
Bbm
I watch the TV screen
Fm
Letting Bob and Shirley
Abm
live my life for me
Gb
It's an opera made of soap using
Ebm
oth er people's hope
Abm
And to morrow's show ain't
Verse 5
Dbm
There was a time when I saw myself
A
a clean- cut cowboy on the screen
C#m
A spurs- and- saddle horse opera,
B
but that's a long- forgotten dream
F#m
Abm
So I watch Let's Make a Deal
Bbm
Bm
and win the jackpot in my brain
Abm
Dbm
Then it's time to watch the show that's
Ebm
Abm
got my cerebellum half insane
Dbm
Verse 6
Db
Here's the story down to earth
Bbm
Shirley's finally given birth
Fm
She's been carrying the
B
Abm
baby for a year
B
Gb
Though it don't belong to Bob
Ebm
Who's been fired from
Abm
his job as a surgeon
Db
'Cause he's got this sudden fear
Verse 7
Db
He can't stand the sight of blood
Bbm
Meanwhile Shirley's mining Judd
Fm
Who's the father of the kid
Abm
B
Abm
but he won't give
Gb
And tomorrow's show will say
Ebm
what they left out yesterday
Abm
Db
And that gives me one good reason I should live
Gb
Ebm
Interlude 1
Gbm
Ebdim
Gbm
Db
Bb
Ebdim
Abm
Dbm
Verse 8
in a shell
Bbm
Bobby's mind is shot to hell
Fm
'Cause he can't recall
Abm
his name or how he feels
B
Gb
He's a lost amnesiac
Ebm
Abm
While his wife is in the back of her station
Db
wagon notching up her heels
Verse 9
Db
Meanwhile Bob's assistant nurse
Bbm
has some pois on in her purse
Fm
And she's gonna slip into
Gb
Good old Judd thought up the scheme
Ebm
Good old Judd is Shirley's dream
Abm
But old Judd don't want
Db
to share her chicken coop
Verse 10
Db
And the nurse would like to keep Shirley's
Bbm
Fm
body six feet deep in her grave
Ab
Abm
And chase him to the Baltic Sea
Gb
For she sees herself his wife to poor Bob
Ebm
Abm
Who's found a life as a farmer
Db
since he lost his memory
Verse 11
Bbm
Bobby's bail ing up the hay
Fm
Ab
While his wife is in the straw
Abm
B
with Bill and Fred
Gb
But she don't feel great inside
Ebm
Abm
It's that dose of cyanide that the nurse and
Db
Judd will feed her til she's dead
Verse 12
Db
There's a baby who just grew
Bbm
fifteen years in only two
Db
Fm
Ab
And she has her eyes on
Abm
Judd who is her dad
B
Gb
But of course she can't know that
She just knows just where it's at
As her mother says,
"It's good to be so glad"
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